Etch-A-Sketch
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has a distorted display. What should I do ?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has these funny little lines all over the screen.
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I turn my Etch-A-Sketch off ?
A: Pick it up and shake it. Set it down.
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has lines that prevent me from doing my art project.
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I delete a document from my Etch-A-Sketch ?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I keep from losing my Etch-A-Sketch document ?
A: Stop shaking it.
Things You Don't Want to Hear From Tech Support!
"Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick handy ?"
"...that's right, not even McGyver could fix it."
"So -- what are you wearing ?"
"Dunno Dude ! Bummer !"
"Looks like you're gonna need some new dilythium crystals,
Cap'n."
"Press 1 for Support.
Press 2 if you're with 60 Minutes.
Press 3 if you're with the FTC."
"We can fix this, but you're gonna need a butter knife, a roll of
duct tape, and a car battery."
"I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."
"In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."
"Hold on a second... Mom ! Timmy's hitting me !"
"Okay, turn to page 523 in your copy of Dianetics."
"Please hold for Mr. Gates' attorney."
