He played the Sax
Had NO B.O.
His whiskers scratched
So She
Let him go!
Burma Shave. |
|
Girls Don't like
Hairy Apes
That's why
They jump
From fire escapes!
Burma-Shave. |
|
|
Listen birds
These signs
Cost money
So roost a while
But don't get funny.
Burma Shave. |
|
Feel your face
As you ride by
Don't you think
It's time
To try
Burma Shave? |
|
A miss a car.
A kiss a curve.
He kissed the miss
And missed
The curve.
Burma Shave. |
|
|
The blackened forest
Smoulders yet
Because
He flipped
A cigarette!
Burma Shave. |
|
The draftee
Tried a tube
And purred:
"Whaddaya know,
I've been de-furred!"
Burma Shave. |
|
If Harmony
Is what
You crave,
Then buy
A tuba
Burma-Shave. |
|
|
Does your husband
misbehave?
Grunt and grumble
rant and rave?
Shoot the brute
Some Burma Shave. |
|
Dinah wouldn't
treat him right
But if he'd
have shaved,
Dinah might!
Burma Shave. |
|
The Mistake
that many make -
they ride
the horn
but not the brake.
Burma Shave. |
|
|
A Man who drives
when he is drunk
should carry
a coffin
in his trunk.
Burma Shave. |
|
Shiver me timbers,
Said Captain Mack.
We're ten knots out,
But we're turning back!
I forgot my
Burma Shave. |
|
A beard
That's rough
And overgrown
Is better than
A chaperone
Burma Shave. |
|
|
Said Juliet
to Romeo
If you
won't shave
Go homeo
Burma Shave. |
|
Does your husband
have a beard?
Is he really acting weird?
If he's living in a cave
Offer him some
Burma Shave. |
|
Hardly a man
is now alive
who topped
this hill
at 95!
Burma Shave. |
|
|
When you lay
Those few cents down
You've bought
The Smoothest
Shave in town
Burma Shave. |
|
Slow down, Pa,
Sakes alive!
Ma missed
Signs
Four & Five.
Burma Shave. |
|
Beneath this vale
Of toil
And sin,
Your head grows bald
But not your chin.
Burma Shave. |
|
|
He lit a match
To check his tank.
That's why
They call him
"Skinless Frank."
Burma Shave. |
|
No lady likes
to dance
or dine
accompanied by
a porcupine!
Burma Shave. |
|
No more him.
No more her.
They kissed
While going
90 per.
Burma Shave. |
|
|
If you must sample
Her pucker paint,
You'd better drive
Where the
Traffic ain't.
Burma Shave. |
|
Said Farmer Brown
Who's bald
on top,
"Wish I could
Rotate the crop!"
Burma Shave. |
|
It was at dinner
That they first met,
He had no cash
To pay the debt,
So Rom-e-ode what Julie-et.
Burma Shave. |
|
|
At school zones
Heed instructions.
Protect
Our little
Tax deductions.
Burma Shave. |
|
