On the roads that pass the city,
On the great asphalted highway,
Spider Robinson, the mighty,
He the Ficton's Lord, descending,
On the porch of a small building
Stood erect, and called the nations,
Called the tribes of men together.
From his fingers flowed a novel,
Leaped into the light of morning,
Calling to my seeking psyche,
Gleamed like Ishkoodah, the comet.

And the Spirit, stooping earthward,
With his finger on my mind's eye
Traced a winding pathway for it,
Saying to it, "Pun in this way!"

From the Internet's raw matter
With his hand he broke a fragment,
Moulded it into a Forum,
Shaped and fashioned it with figures;
From the novel, deftly written,
Took a motto, shaped and formed it,
With its hope imbued within it;
Filled the forum with this motto,
With the spirit of this motto;

"Share your pain, that it may dwindle,
Share your joy, that it may increase!"

Till the multitudes could hear it
And erect within the Forum
Lou the Rose - one, he the mighty
Smashed a glass into the fireplace
As a signal to the nations.
And Lou's ***smash*** Rose slowly, slowly,
Through the tranquil air of morning,
First a tinkle in the quiet,
Then a louder, richer sounding,
Then a full-blown Toast echoing
Through the hallowed halls of Delphi.

Ever rising, rising, rising,
Till it touched the top of heaven,
Till it broke against the heaven,
And rolled outward all around it.

Called to Cstar, she who giggles,
Called to J.P., (Long-Drink sent 'im),
Called to Brian, north of Boston,
Called to Yola, turned worms brought her,
Called to Bright, whose Pookah drugged her!
Called Oolom, whose sheep-dog fetched her,
Called the Bard with fishy swimmings!
Called Shameaa, came and fetched her,
Cured Walt of arachnophobia,
Lured with drink the hunting Kestrel,

Called to Pewter, paddling museless,
Will, in rubber, hitched a ride in,
Punstergal, in pain, found friends here,
Saint came circling, eyes closed, punning!
Sad, Selena sought her Sol Ace,
Mouse was brought in LizKat's pocket;
Moby spouts that two Jakes brought him,
Lured into the Net by punning;
Net a Whale? Behold Lou's power!

Kirwand hunted tunes for FastEd,
Trailed Jake low, then high detectEd;
Bob the Dragon fled a thief's fire,
Roofed his bike and left us speechless!

LizKat, Naiad, left her river,
Left her spirit's home, to join us!
Honored are we, by our members.
Helen, lost in snow, was guided
To the warmth and merry banter.
Midus, called by Bright (Light-giver!)
Fought through demons 'round the planet,
Fought, and won! We laud her triumph.
Ron came through a bookstore's backdoor,
Tracking peanut butter, bootless!

Echoes of the Toast, resounding,
Called and calls the thirsty punsters,
Called to me, and many others,
Called in voices filled with laughter!
Called with puns and poems and stories!
Lou the Mighty watched, approving,
Watched as Mike, first 'tender, called 'em;
Slaked their thirst and made them merry!
Where's *your* epic? Share the story,
Tell how Callahan's first called you.

-- David DGBREWER 6/27/99 Edited 7/19/99